Why This Kit Exists
In a world where algorithms push us toward arguments and division, we need tools to build bridges. These questions are designed to create connection, not conflict. They invite stories, not debates.
Remember: The goal isn't to agree on everything. The goal is to understand each other better and leave feeling uplifted, not divided.
💡 How to Use These Questions
- Listen to understand, not to reply. Give the person space to share fully.
- No "yes, but..." Just listen and ask follow-up questions.
- Share your own answer. Vulnerability builds connection.
- Skip politics and hot-button topics. Focus on experiences and values.
- It's okay to disagree. The goal is understanding, not agreement.
🌟 Getting to Know You (Light & Easy)
1. What's one thing that made you smile this week?
2. What's a skill you've always wanted to learn?
3. What's your favorite way to spend a Saturday morning?
4. What's a place you've visited that surprised you?
5. What's something you're grateful for that you often take for granted?
6. What's a book, movie, or song that changed how you see the world?
7. What's a small act of kindness you received that you'll never forget?
8. What's something you do that makes you feel most like yourself?
💭 Values & Beliefs (Deeper Connection)
9. What's a value your family taught you that you still hold today?
10. What's something you believe about people that gives you hope?
11. What's a challenge you've overcome that made you stronger?
12. What's something you've learned about yourself in the past year?
13. What's a tradition or ritual that's meaningful to you?
14. What's something you want to be remembered for?
15. What's a piece of advice you'd give your younger self?
16. What's something you've changed your mind about as you've gotten older?
👥 Relationships & Community
17. Who's someone in your life who always makes you feel better?
18. What's a quality you admire in others that you're working on in yourself?
19. What's something you wish people understood about you?
20. What's a way you like to show people you care?
21. What's a community you're part of that's important to you?
22. What's something you've learned from someone very different from you?
23. What's a way you've seen people come together during hard times?
24. What's something you do to stay connected with people you care about?
🌱 Growth & Reflection
25. What's something you're proud of that you don't often talk about?
26. What's a mistake you made that taught you something valuable?
27. What's something you're working on improving in yourself?
28. What's a fear you've overcome or are working to overcome?
29. What's something you've let go of that made your life better?
30. What's a goal you have that's not about money or career?
31. What's something you do to take care of your mental health?
32. What's a way you've grown in the past few years?
🎯 Purpose & Impact
33. What's a way you like to make a positive difference?
34. What's something you do that makes you feel most alive?
35. What's a cause or issue you care about and why?
36. What's something you've done that you're glad you did, even though it was hard?
37. What's a way you've seen small actions create big impact?
38. What's something you want to contribute to the world?
39. What's a way you've helped someone that they might not even know about?
40. What's something you believe everyone should experience at least once?
🌈 Joy & Wonder
41. What's something simple that brings you joy?
42. What's a memory that always makes you smile?
43. What's something you find beautiful that others might overlook?
44. What's a way you like to celebrate small wins?
45. What's something that fills you with wonder?
46. What's a place in nature that feels special to you?
47. What's something you're curious about?
48. What's a way you like to recharge?
49. What's something that always lifts your spirits?
50. What's one thing you're looking forward to?
🚫 Questions to Avoid
These topics tend to create division rather than connection:
- Political candidates or parties
- Hot-button social issues (unless you know the person well and they're open to discussion)
- Religious doctrine or theological debates
- Controversial current events designed to provoke
- Anything that starts with "Don't you think..." (this invites argument)
Remember: The goal is connection, not conversion. We're choosing 90% positive, which means we focus on what brings us together, not what divides us.
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